Today, our beautiful baby girl was diagnosed with NEC. This afternoon she had surgery to see how far along it was. Tonight, she is dying.
Dr. Gallucci (the surgeon) came for us less than an hour and a half after he started the surgery, which we knew was way too quick and we knew it was a bad sign. What he found was not good. Her entire bowel system is dead, a victim of this sudden and terrible digestive disease. A person cannot live without a bowel.
They outlined everything for us and basically said that she will most likely not make it through the weekend. Even surviving the night would be a bit of a surprise.
The best case scenario would be that she makes it another 48 hours, stabilizes, has another surgery to remove all the dead bowel before it manages to spread to the rest of her organs, survives for a year on iv feedings, finds a bowel donor, and has successful organ transplant surgery. The odds of that happening are effectively zero. She's too far gone and too small for her body to survive all of this.
Thus, Annaleigh is dying.
Now, we are waiting for her heart to give out. She's already shown signs that it is weakening and so it is just a matter of time before it stops. We know it is coming. We just don't know if it will happen in the next few hours or not until tomorrow. But it is going to happen.
We've been with her for the last several hours, holding her and loving her. Our parents all came up to say goodbye. My brother John is currently driving back from Connecticut with his girlfriend to see her. All the nurses have been with us, even the ones who are not our nurses. Marissa, Annaleigh's primary night nurse, is off today but she's coming in to see her and take care of her. There were 89 comments on the "Annaleigh is having surgery" post that I made late in the afternoon, despite the fact that people usually check this site only before bed or in the morning.
Annaleigh is loved. By a lot of people. Some of those people are perfect strangers and so I felt that we owed it to all of you to post right now, to keep you all informed about what is happening. Thank you all for the thoughts and prayers tonight and every day for the past two months.
Annaleigh has brought us such joy and happiness in her short time. We love her more than we can express.
We will post again when it is all over.
477 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 401 – 477 of 477I have been following your story and my heart goes out to you, Joe and your children. You don't know me but you have been an inspiration to me to stay hopeful that one day I will have my own miracle. Love to you all.
My heart goes out to you and your family. We lost our baby girl the same way and there are no words that can truly ease the loss.
It is nearly 8 years later and we are blessed with one surviving triplet. I think one of the most difficult things I experienced is that I was never able to fully grieve the loss of my other 2 babies without joy and thankfulness and never able to fully celebrate the survival of my 1 without a sense of sadness for the loss of his siblings.
I will pray for you and your beautiful family. Life does go on, and I urge you to allow yourself to feel all of the emotions you are feeling as fully as possible.
Dear God,
Please hold this family in Your arms today. Please bring them strength to face this unimaginable loss. Keep their hearts bound together with Your love and help them to see Your beauty amidst this awful tragedy. I pray these things in Your name. Amen...
praying for you...
I have followed your blog for a long while now, and have prayed for you and your beautiful babies every day. My heart is broken for you and your family. I can not even begin to imagine how devastating this is. May you take comfort knowing that so many people are thinking and praying for you all. Annaleigh will forever remain in our hearts.
We love you guys more than we can say. If you need anything from us please let us know.
Love,
Doug, Christina, Owen, and Dylan
Words can not begin to express how sad I am with this news. I am praying for you, Brooke & Joe. And of course, for your entire family. God Bless AnnaLeigh and all of you.
My heart breaks for you and your family. Your baby girl is loved and will continue to be loved. Sending prayers
I'm so so so sorry. And she is so so so loved.
I began reading your blog a few weeks ago. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for what you have had to go through. My son was born premature. I was 32 weeks and his journey was very similar to Annaleigh's. He had a lot of GI troubles and was allergic to everything...even breast milk! He spent most of his time on numberous antibiotics. He was on IV fluids for weeks. He was poked for test after test. I wasn't allowed to hold him for a week. The day I left the hospital to go home he got NEC. When I returned the next morning there were circles all over his belly and he had a measuring tape for a belt. They had to measure the girth and keep track of the uptrouded bowels. I have never been sooo scared in my life. The nurse told me to NOT go home and google NEC because what I would find would be frightening...I did it anyway. He was on 3 antibiotics just for the NEC, under the heat lamps to help retain his body temperature,on oxygen because he had been born very anemic, and looking so pathetic. AFter a week and thousands of Xrays and tests...they decided the worst has passed and he was doing better. I was allowed to hold him again. A few days later his central line came out and they placed a new one in his ankle. Then that one became infected...then the IV in his head became infected and so on and so on. The point is the babies are much tougher than you think. I now how a curious 2 year old. He loves to run, jump, play with his sister and yell at the top of his lungs. I hope Annaliegh is able to turn this around and get better. My prayers are with your family. I hope that my comment will leave you with the comfort of knowing that others have been through what you're going through now.
Lisa McGill, Arizona
TweedledLMK@aol.com
No words can ease any pain you are in so all I will say is my prayers are with all of you and just know that Lily and Charlie will have a guardian angel forever.
Jill
im so sorry..hugsss..
Your family is in my thoughts and prayers...
I'm so sorry, I will keep your family in my prayers.
I am so sorry -- you and your entire family are in my prayers, I am praying for a miracle.
Oh you guys I am so sad...it is not fair, and I am sorry. Your little cutie touched many hearts.
I am another stranger who has been following you, your husband and your sweet babies. My heart is broken for you today. I never pray but every ounce of my being is praying for a miracle for your sweet girl. I can only hope that your family gets the miracle it so deserves.
I am so very sorry - this isn't the news I was expecting this morning and it breaks my heart. Your whole family is loved. You all will certainly be in my thoughts and prayers for a very long time.
I just wanted you to know that I am sending thoughts and prayers to your family. You have handled all of this with an amazing grace. No person should have to experience all that you have been through.
BRSaugust20 from TTTC
I am so so sorry to hear. I've been following you and your babies' story on the nest/bump. I know what you're going through. I recently lost my little Jack to NEC and know how swiftly the disease moves and how heartbreaking it is. Please feel free to contact me if you ever feel the need.
Maria (Futuremrscuoghi)
maria.donnoli@gmail.com
There are truly no words for this. Thank you so much for sharing your story so openly and allowing the rest of the world to fall in love with your babies. I hope that the love that all of us "strangers" are shining your way right now brings your family just a little peace in this awful time. My husband and I are praying for you.
-Roxanne (romosquare from WC)
I am so very sorry to hear about Annaleigh. Brooke, I know you though SAIF. I just recently lost my baby at 12 weeks and I very much appreciated your support so I am here to offer mine now to you. I am so sorry to hear about your precious Annaleigh. There are no words. My thoughts and prayers are with you both during this very difficult time.
I am praying for a miracle for your sweet girl. If it is her time to go, I pray that she be welcomed into her Father's arms in peace and happiness.
As many have have said before, there are no words, just the hope that you and your family can be strong for each other and Charlie and Lily.
I'm a new reader to your blog and have just spent the last 2 hours catching up on your amazing family.
My thoughts are with you all as you deal with this cruel, cruel blow. Annaleigh is a little fighter, and I know you will spend all the time you can loving her.. she knows she is loved; she's felt it since the day she was born.
Many hugs and positive thoughts are with you today.
I am so sorry.
I have been following your blog from afar and have rejoiced with you as you watched your precious babies grow. Even though I dont know you I am devastated for you. Please know Annaleigh is loved by so many more people than you will ever realise.
I will be praying for you all.
Much love.
my heart truly aches for you, Brooke and Joe. you are such wonderful, dedicated, loving parents, and Annaleigh is so lucky she gets to experience you two, regardless of how long her life is. There are no words to express my sorrow, but please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Cat (KittyCatRollerMoM from Multiple Mamas/The Bump)
I have never posted on your blog, but saw you through The Nest and have been praying for your family over the past few months. I'm so sorry this is happening.. my heart is breaking for you guys. Just wanted to let you know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers constantly.
Saying how sorry I am is just not enough. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so so sorry you and your family have to go through this tough time! I'm sure she's a beautiful little baby girl, and she will be peaceful and happy when this is all "over". Please keep us updated and know you will always have a support system from all the viewers!
-Member of Modern Bliss board
You have been on my mind all night. I may not "know" you but I followed your story on thebump. Stay strong and realize many people are thinking of you now.
My prayers are with you during this difficult time. I'm so very sorry, and my God bless you all.
Brooke and Joe, I am so sorry. I wish there was something I could say or do. Annaleigh received such wonderful care and so much love in her short time here. I hope that, and Charlie and Lily, will bring you comfort and peace throughout this.
- Kristin (John and Rebecca's friend)
I am so sorry. My prayers for you family.
I have never read your blog until today. I found you from sweet girlies blog. I am just crying over what you have to deal with today. I am a preemie mom and I cannot imagine going through this. Let God be your strength and may he give you the peace that passes all understanding.
praying for you...
-casey
Brooke and Joe,
I am so sorry! Annaleigh has been in my thoughts and prayers. My heart is breaking for you today. I am lifting you and your families up in prayer.
Kimberly
I'm so, so sorry. Your family will be in my thoughts.
Brooke & Joe, My heart aches for the both of you. I am so sorry to read this today. I will pray for all of you. Please take care of yourselves.
Nancy
nancy814 (the nest)
I am sending you strength, love and prayers. I am so so sorry. I am crying as I write this. God Bless her and you and I hope you last time with her is peaceful.
I am so sorry for all that your family is going through.
I will keep your family in my constant prayers.
I am one of those stranger who has been following your site & praying for your little ones. My son was also a preemie so this touches a special place in my heart. I pray for a miracle for your little Annaleigh.
Stay strong & take care!!
Dawn
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your beautiful baby girl.
~The Covey family (The Bump)
a friend just shared your blog and i've been reading your story. i'm so very, very sorry, and wanted you all to know you're in my thoughts and prayers!
barbara in virginia
I am praying now for the soul of your baby and for all of you.
God bless,
Silver
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My heart aches for you but I am grateful that Annaleigh came to this world to touch so many lives. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Be at peace, you have an angel with you forever. Thoughts and prayers to your family.
My heart is breaking for you. Stay strong for eachother and Annaleigh. My thoughts and prayers are with your family.
I dont know what else to say except that I am praying for you guys. And I will continue to do so.
Brooke and Joe,
I am one of those perfect strangers who have been reading your blog for weeks. Your entire family is in my thoughts and prayers during this time.
God Bless you always.
Perfect Stranger from Tampa, FL
Brooke & Joe,
You don't know me, and I've never commented on your blog before. I've lurked/posted on the What's Cooking board on and off for about a year now. I remember seeing Brooke's announcement that she was pregnant and expecting triplets! I was so happy to see such wonderful news, and "kept tabs" on Brooke on the message boards for a while after that. Eventually, I lost track, and last month, out of the blue, I thought about you guys and wondered how you were doing. I was able to find your blog, and was surprised to see that your babies had already been born!
I've been reading every day for about a month now, and have grown so attached to your little ones. I look forward to reading the updates every morning. And I've just been so happy to see how well they've all been doing and reading about how they're growing.
Needless to say, this news about Annaleigh is just devastating. I can't believe how quickly things have turned from good to absolutely horrible. I had to read and reread in order to even process it all.
I am absolutely heartbroken. I can't imagine what you are going through as her parents. I am still praying for a miracle for Annaleigh, and pray for the two of you, Lily, and Charlie. No matter what happens, you are not in this alone. I'm sure you have wonderful family and friends to support you, but please know that you also have all of us out here that are praying and crying with you, too.
God bless Annaleigh, and your entire little family.
XOXO
Your family is in my family's thoughts and prayers.
I am so, so sorry. I will continue to pray for your family -- for strength and peace in this difficult time.
I saw your blog posted on a friend's facebook. I am so so sorry for what you are dealing with. You, annaleigh and your families are in my thoughts and prayers.
You don't know me but you, your beautiful daughter, and your beautiful family will be in my thoughts. She is so loved.
I have tears pouring down my face for a baby I've never met and parents I don't even know. I've been following back since Brooke's cooking blog, and though I rarely comment, I have been glued to updates on your precious babies and check your blog as soon as I wake up in the morning, praying for all of you the whole time. My heart goes out to all of you.
I am so sorry for what your family is going through. My prayers are with you and your little Annaleigh.
you are in my thoughts. You are in my prayers.
Keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers!!!!
I don't know if this will help you or not, but there is a yahoo group called preemieblogmoms that you would be welcome to join. Many there are parents of multiples, all are parents of micropreemis, and many have suffered loss - all have done the NICU roller coaster. You would find a lot of support from other parents who have been there.
I know life is busy with babies in the NICU. I pray for you and your family.
Sarah
There is no truer statement than the title of your post. I've been reading your blog religiously and have been amazed by the love you've both showered your babies with. I'm sitting here with tears falling, so wishing things could be different. To say it's unfair doesn't even begin to describe this. I'm so sorry. I'll be thinking of you and your family. You are all loved.
Brooke & Joe - I read your blog all of the time. You have been such an inspiration to me. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers! Sending love and good will to all of you! (love "huskerchica" from the nest)
I am praying for you and your family. May God bless you all.
Annaleigh is loved. Blessings little baby.
I am so sorry all of this is happening to you--to her. My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. Peace and blessings.
xoxo, Monica
I've been following your blog for awhile now, and I just felt I had to post a comment here. I am so sorry and sad to read about Annaleigh. That's so heartbreaking. I will be praying for Annaleigh and your entire family.
I am so sorry and saddened to hear thi. Your family is in my prayers.
You all are constantly in my thoughts. Your strength is inspiring. God Bless sweet baby Annaleigh.
-Sara (psychsara from WC)
My deepest prayers and thoughts are with your family this weekend. Annaleigh is LOVED by us, near and far.
Brooke & Joe - our love and care for you now during this difficult time - from the RI Nesties
I was brought to your blog through another multiples blog, and feel compelled to tell you how deeply sorry I am, even though I know those words don't bring any comfort during a difficult time like this. This was the first time I had read your blog, and still I was brought to tears.
You will all be in my prayers.
I am so very very sorry my husband and I will be praying for you and Annaleigh. You are constantly in my thoughts and prayers daily.
I got to your blog from the Nest and had been reading occasionally. Even though I know that nothing I say can ease your pain... I am so very sorry to hear about your little Annaleigh. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I am so sorry for your loss. May God bless you and your family during this very difficult time.
Rest in peace baby girl!!
My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. May god bless your little angel. Rest in Peace little one, and remember you were dearly loved by all.
Brooke & Joe, you are both in my prayers.
I am praying for Annaleigh and for the family. I can not imaging the pain that you are going through. You are both amazing parents and your precious baby girl is so very loved.
I am new to your blog. I just read all of this, your whole back story.
I just had to comment to tell you that I am so very sorry and that Annaleigh is very beautiful. Sometimes the greatest miracles in this world only grace our presense for a very short time and within that time they leave us forever changed, they leave us with a sense of love and beauty that will linger in our souls, they leave us with a warmth that lets us know that they are never truly gone, just hidden until it is our time to be called home.
Rest in peace little one!
Stacii
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